- — @дневники: асоциальная сеть

вторник, 05 июля 2005

23:39

Cries in Norwegian

What am I supposed to do?

When I feel nothing, but I want to?

What am I supposed to say?

No one ever listens, anyway...

(c)Cruxshadows, "Sinking"

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03:44

Cries in Norwegian

И все будет развиваться по накатанному сценарию.

Вместо того, чтобы помочь мне, Алекс поможет им. Они будут вместе, счастливые, а я перестану ходить в dining-hall по вечерам, буду ненавидеть работу на кухне, возвращаясь домой, буду заваливаться спать и спать, спать, спать, только чтобы не видеть их счастье.

А вообще я болею. Я устала. Я домой хочу, в Россию. Но будет ли мне там лучше, чем здесь?..

Тот, кто стал причиной моих слез, никогда не увидит их.

@настроение: nervous

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понедельник, 04 июля 2005

08:32

Tennis

Cries in Norwegian

Today I decided to take lessons of tennis from Alex.

Because Alla called me with her or because of what?..

And I'm gonna beat him at the end of the camp!!! :-D

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суббота, 02 июля 2005

18:09

Cries in Norwegian

I say stupid things and have stupid consequences.

Planning to take Tomas for a walk to GPC... But is that right?..

All of my failures are only my fault.

"Love is like a sword with two sharps - one of them could change whole world, but the other could hurt you painfully" (c)

I wish that this 'affection' lasting for three weeks was just a part of my past.

@настроение: hands are shaking

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пятница, 01 июля 2005

04:28

Cries in Norwegian

Hmmm... Kenren sent me so few photos... But that's much better than nothing.

Other pictures are in comments.

Me, Alla, Julia, Olesya, Natasha, before going to Camp Winaukee for boys.

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четверг, 30 июня 2005

19:21

Cries in Norwegian

Alex is tired of helping me. =(

What is the sense of helping a person, who is doing nothing?..

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среда, 29 июня 2005

08:08

Cries in Norwegian

Хочу разводить пауков!

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07:56

Just P.S.

Cries in Norwegian

He is not like the others. He is weird - but weird in a positive sense of this word, and I usually strive towards such people. He is sociable, he is everywhere, with everybody, but at the same time so unusual... He has two hobbies, which can't go together - drinking and creating, inventing something... When he drinks he does not hook up girls, like most of the guys do, but start talking on different philosophical topics. He is so interesting to talk to! Sometimes, when we sit in the dining hall and talk, he takes just a sheet of paper and makes paper flowers, birds, anything - real masterpieces! In the high school he was called "McGyver" or "freak" - he likes making something so much! It seemed that you can give him a bubble-gum, and he will make a plane of it. He went in for karate, though he is so skinny ^^, he can count in Japanese, he meows like a cat, - in one word, he does the things that usual people do not do. His voice is so soft and velvet, that sometimes I cannot help thinking that he wants everybody around to fall asleep by its influence. He flirts with the girls, he teases them, but he does not begin serious relations with any of them, and he steps into the shadows before something can start. During the conversation he always looks into his opponent's eyes, and I love this about him. Everything, everything in him is turned inside out, but it seems so charming, so intriguing that you cannot be indifferent

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вторник, 28 июня 2005

19:02

Песня на все случаи жизни.

Cries in Norwegian

Depeche Mode "See you"

All I want to do is see you again

Is that too much to ask for?

I just want to see your sweet smile

Smiled the way it was before

Well I'll try not to hold you

And I'll try not to kiss you

And I won't even touch you

All I want to do is see you

Don't you know that it's true

I remember the days when we'd walk through the woods

And sit on a bench for a while

I treasure the way we used to laugh and play

And look in each others eyes

You can keep me at a distance if you don't trust my resistance

But I swear I won't touch you

All I want to do is see you

Don't you know that it's true

Well I know five years is a long time

And that times change (oh that times change)

But I think that you will find

People are basically the same (basically the same)

If the water's still flowing, we can go for a swim

And do the things we used to do

And if I'm reluctant you can pull me in

And we can relive our youth

Oh but we'll stay friendly like sister and brother

Though I think I still love you

All I want to do is see you

Don't you know that it's true?

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08:57

Cries in Norwegian

Today's evening was great =)

Alex, you did a great job =)

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воскресенье, 26 июня 2005

22:52

Cries in Norwegian

"It was only a purgatory, and now it will be hell" (c) Pawel, when the kids were going to arrive =))))

Why did he tell this to me, than to anybody else?..

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09:14

Cries in Norwegian

Все. С завтрашнего дня открываю сезон охоты.

Начну, пожалуй, с доков, на которых сегодня было так красиво, где огни противоположного берега отражались в воде, а звезды, казалось, двигались в небе.

@настроение: romantic

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суббота, 25 июня 2005

23:30

Cries in Norwegian

Шаг второй. Меня тянет на "написать". Причем написать не абы-что, "чтобы было", а выплеснуть куда-то все свои эмоции, чтобы это был порыв, внезапный и мгновенный, в котором бы отражалось все мое состояние на данный момент. Но что это будет?.. Стихоплет из меня никакой (да и устала я от вечных попыток найти более-менее хорошую рифму..) Тогда что же? Рассказ в духе любовных романов?.. Или триллер с элементами детектива?.. К сожалению, я настолько самокритична, что чтобы я ни написала, я выброшу творение в мусор с мыслью, что накалякала отписку и вообще можно было провести время с большей пользой. Хотя мне говорили в свое время, что я хорошо пишу. Наверное, так и пропадают великие художники, поэты, музыканты - самокритичность своей рукой зарывает их таланты в землю...

Пойти, что ли, в Arts and Crafts - слепить что-нибудь?.. Душе реально плохо от переполняющих эмоций.

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